Pissed again...(Undertaker, Piper)
Posted by: Eddy Guerrero on 05/19/2003 at 18:33
*The camera fades in backstage, shortly after Rampage, where Eddy Guerrero is seated in his locker room, a towel draped across his shoulders. He seems intensely focused. Meanwhile, Chavo, still in his business suit, paces around him, talking.*
Chavo: They can't write you off so fast now, huh Eddy? Do you feel it? You took the Family's newest recruit and beat him within an inch of his life! You let him grab the mic because you knew that he had to do a lot more than that to win! Then the Undertaker tries to fire you, and you defy him again! We're back on track, Eddy! At this rate, you can probably SEAL a rematch with The Chosen One at Independence and-
Eddy: Slow down, Chavo.
Chavo: Huh?
Eddy: I beat John Cena. I beat a rookie on his first night. Whoop-dee-shit. That's like beating the Brooklyn Brawler or Gillberg-EVERYONE wins. It was nothing. I'm pissed at it, though. I let him get that mic. I know, I know, the three falls in a row to win, but he got a fall, Chavo. He got a fall. And if Hebner had seen it, I'd have still had more beating to do on him. Don't you see? That was NOT World title caliber, hell, it wasn't even Intercontinental caliber! It was horrible! I shoulda had him through three tables in three minutes, ese, and I didn't.
Chavo: That's just being harsh on yourself, Eddy.
Eddy: But it got worse. You and I were "rescued" by FUCKING JARRETT and Kidman. Do you know how embarassing that is for me? You and I coulda taken the Dead Man, but they run out and make us look like fools! Plus, that was my free ticket outta the Army, with no blood on my hands, and they ruin it. *Standing up and throwing his chair* THEY FUCKING RUINED IT, AND THEY MADE US LOOK LIKE SHIT WHILE DOING IT! That does not sit well with me, ese. You and I both know that Calloway couldn't have taken us. I was fucking World Champ, and you had a helluva career here too.
Chavo: Yes, that was an unfortunate turn of events. But please, hear me out, Eddy. I think that we may benefit in the long run from the Chosen Alliance's actions.
Eddy: *Calming down* What makes you say that?
Chavo: Well, the Undertaker, clearly, wants to sever your ties to the Army. Otherwise, he would not have come out to attack you on a night where he is being hunted. Now then, if he wants you out of the Army, what better way to anger him than NOT to leave? You can hang around as dead weight to the Fatal Army, keeping them from fulfilling their goals. You set your own agenda and ruin theirs. If this works as I see it, the Undertaker will be divided between the Chosen Alliance and us as to who his greatest threat is. Not to mention the fact that he still has to answer to Chavoman and Booker T.
Eddy: So...if I hang around, I can hurt the Army?
Chavo: Yes.
Eddy: Damn, nice thinking ese! You got cheating down to an art!
Chavo: Well, thank you. Now, we have to build on this momentum by fighting someone else next week, someone that will both raise the bar of your status and anger the Undertaker-
Eddy: Piper.
Chavo: What?!
Eddy: The Undertaker called Piper a mere "example" or some shit and that he destroyed him as a lesson. I bet the Undertaker wants to ignore Piper now, and that's exactly what I won't do. I will hunt down Piper and call him out for Rampage. In fact, I'll make it a brutal match, too. One that I would save for a Fatal Army target. The Chairshot Survival Deathmatch.
Chavo: ...ARE YOU INSANE?!?!
Eddy: Hear me out, ese. The LAST time I was in one was Masato Tanaka, and I gave him the beating of a lifetime in his own match. Now imagine me doing the same thing to that old man Piper. The Undertaker will hate my wasted effort, I'll get another win, and we're a step closer to the World strap again.
Chavo: ...that, that just might work, Eddy. In fact, I love the idea. Beating a legend should raise your ranking, and Calloway won't like it. This could be a great night for you...
Eddy: Every night is for the Guerreros, ese. We NEVER lose...
Chavo: ...because we Cheat To Win!
*The Guerreros look at each other, smiling at their own brilliance, as the camera fades to black...*
