Oh hell no...(Fatal Army, everyone)
Posted by: Eddy Guerrero on 04/08/2003 at 23:20
THUNK!
SMACK!
CRASH!
*Anything not nailed down in Eddy's locker room backstage at the Pontiac Silverdome is now flying across the room. Still covered in blood and wearing his wrestling attire (as it is shortly after the match) Eddy is hurling chairs, trash cans, and lockers about in his usual angry fashion. Chavo Guerrero, Jr., Attorney-At-Law, enters, wearing a sharp black business suit and his wireframe glasses. He ducks a fruit basket before speaking.*
Chavo: EDDY! EDDY! Calm down.
Eddy: CALM DOWN?!?! HOW?! WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT, ESE?! Where the FUCK did The Chosen One come from? Huh? You're my liason with 'Taker, bud, you better have some answers!
Chavo: Look, I just talked to Minister. They're confused as you. I think he is here to do what he says he is: to clean out the FTR. He probably attacked you because you're Fatal Army.
Eddy: Well, Chavo, I see where you're coming from, and it's Make Believe Land, with happy elves and dancing faeries and cute leprechauns with funny little hats! Undertaker is a deceiving son of a bitch-that IS why I side with him. I didn't do it his way, and now he's pulled this shit to teach me a lesson.
Chavo: He wouldn't do that-
Eddy: HAVE I TAUGHT YOU NOTHING?! I LIE, CHEAT, and STEAL! I cheat to win EVERY time, and I forgot to cheat out there. TCO is Undertaker's creation. It's his puppet, ese. Look at Kidman. He was TCO too, and what was he? Undertaker's tool. *pause* Sometimes, I think he's got it figured out.
Chavo: You mean...?
Eddy: Naw, I wouldn't really leave. But at least he doesn't put up with Big Deadly. I can already hear him bitching me out for losing-what else COULD I do? I didn't know I'd get a monster like The Chosen One, I thought it'd be Day One Jeff. Don't you have some other FTR law to help me?
Chavo: No, I think we exhausted them. You're outta the title picture.
Eddy: SHIT! *throws another chair*
Chavo: Whoa whoa whoa, look on the bright side. We got rid of Green.
*Eddy stops all movement and glares at Chavo.*
Eddy: TOM GREEN?!?! YOU IDIOT!!! I'd rather see the General ANY DAY than TCO. He dove off a cage, moron! He goes to extremes that the General never did, ese! Why do I keep carrying your ass?
Chavo: YOU carrying ME?! Wait, when's the last time you did that?
Eddy: Well, your Iron Man run...
Chavo: Oh come on! YOU'RE the one that wanted to lay down!
Eddy: And now...
Chavo: YOU LET MY CAREER DIE! YOU LET JEFF JARRETT WRECK MY CAREER! And NOW look at me-I'm in the most evil organization in FTR history because my oh-so-brilliant UNCLE thinks they're good at cheating.
Eddy: That was low, ese. You're doing better.
Chavo: *rolls his eyes* And WHO enrolled me in the Second Coming? THAT was a brilliant stable, Eddy! Yeah, let's join the Reverend! What'd it take, TWO cards for us to get kicked out?
Eddy: Okay, okay, so you sacrificed for me. But I did for you!
Chavo: Oh really? When? My career here was SOLO, ESE. When did I win? WITHOUT YOU!
Eddy: Sounds like you wanna try it again...
Chavo: Maybe I do, Eddy. Maybe I do...
*Chavo storms out of the locker room as Eddy runs to the door behind him.*
Eddy: Chavo, get back here...CHAVO!...damn...
*Eddy turns back, dejectedly, as the camera fades to black...*
