Giant Disappointments (Big Show)
Posted by: The Sinister Minister on 01/30/2003 at 23:04
We open, for the first time in a long time, inside of The Sinister Minister's ramshackled office. Once upon a time, this office belonged to one of the most controversial figures in FTR history...Ashcrow Larkspurr. However, that very long ago. Now, the office belongs solely to The Sinister Minister.
The Minister is sitting at his desk, looking straight at the camera.
Minister: "Hello and welcome to Hell boys and girls. Today's topic is: 'The Biggest Disappointment in the Entire World.' And just who is the biggest disappointment in the entire world? He is a man named Paul Wight. And just who is Paul Wight? He doesn't even seem to know anymore. I mean, he claimed that The Undertaker was calling him by the wrong name? Give me a break. I mean...if I were as bad as you, WIGHT, I would wanna change my identity too. But I just don't think it works when you're a 7'2, 500 pound sack of shit.
"I could go on and on about you, Paul. But that would get as dull and repetitive as one of your matches. Let's not focus on your run in The Dungeon of Doom..or that God-forsaken Monster Truck Sumo Match. Instead..let's take a look at your most recent folly.
"Despite MY protests...The Undertaker wanted you to be in The Fatal Army. It wasn't a great spot...but it was a spot nonetheless. He was willing to give you the SAME opportunity that Eric Bischoff gave you in WCW. He was willing to give you the SAME opportunity that Vince McMahon gave you in the WWF. He was willing to give you the SAME opportunity that EVERY MAJOR PROMOTER IN THIS BUSINESS has given you.....the SAME opportunity that you have time and time again BLOWN!
"And what happened? Why, the same thing that ALWAYS happens! You blew it again! You would rather hang out with a PUPPET?! A puppet?! Give me a break, Wight. That's not even worth our attention.
"But unfortunately, there's this little thing that The Undertaker firmly believes in. That LITTLE thing is called revenge...and well..let's see...just what would Taker say?
"I know!
"The fury of the fires of Hell will consume you for your sins.
"In other words....you're fucked. As The Undertaker's manager....I'm making a formal challenge to you. At Genesis..you put up the Extreme Title against The Undertaker in a closed cage match.
"You might as well go ahead and do it, Paul. I mean..if you don't, chances are you're going to wind up in one of several places.
"You could wind up locked in a casket. Or..you could wind up on an altar about to have your heart ritualistically cut out. Or...you could wind up in a funeral parlor, about to be embalmed alive. Or...you could end up buried up to your neck in a cemetery...right next to a big ole stack of TNT. There are sooo many things I've seen The Undertaker do to people, you know. Don't make it harder on yourself.
