JLAP? Jobbers, Losers, And Peons...
Posted by: Edge & Christian on 01/23/2003 at 16:12
I guess I met the devil, But I sure didn't know no better You were kool as hell like e-mail, But still timeless like a letter As I sit and I stare at the satanic glare, On the glass frame in front of your face You're alone on my shelf, Yelling "Look at yourself" I feel like Bobby Brady breaking the vase
But now you're all screwed up
You're so yesterday Miles away I promised myself on New Years Day I'd take a bath today And wash you away As all your little blond hairs go down the drain
Your sister called me yesterday to tell me I was a loser At least I haven't lost my mind And at least I'm not a boozer As I tried to heed to your wants and your needs You were solemnly lost in space So keep reading your books on "how to give dirty looks" Everytime I should be put in my place
*From the entrance emerges Edge, Christian, and Hulk Hogan. They have the Reeking of Awesomeness Tag Team Titles over their shoulders as they make their way to the ring. Before they can make it to the ring, they're met with a mixture of boos and thrown trash.*
Christian: *Kicking away empty cups* "LOOK AT THIS! Look around! You people are SO well represented by what you've thrown in here! You people aren't anything but a bunch of crap!"
Edge: "That's SO right Christian. I mean it looks like Atlanta, G-EH is the chumpstain capital of America!"
Christian: "And you know how we're going to solve this? It's simple. Become the World Tag Team Champions and not have to visit *BLEEP*holes like this place ever again!!!"
Edge: "Only in a place like this could you people must ANY respect for two men who think they're superheros. And not the real kind like Christianzilla and the Hulkster...oh no. Chavoman? Iron-Stevie?!?! What the hell are you guys thinking?!?"
Christian: "They're not even real superheros!!!"
Edge: "That's right Christian. And do you people know why?!? They don't have superpowers! They can't fly. They don't have superstrength. They don't have ANY superpowers..."
*Christian puts his hand up and interrupts Edge.*
Edge: "What?"
Christian: "They do have a superpower you forgot about Edge...They totally have the ability to suck and blow at the exact same time!!!"
*The crowd obviously doesn't approve of the comment and greets the Blondes with a chorus of boos.*
Edge: "Hey Chavo...Tough Enough called...they want your pride back..."
Hulk Hogan: "Woah, Woah, Woah brothers. If we were gonna come out here and talk about how Un-Super the JLAP were, we'd take up every single minute until Rampage! But ya know something brothers, this Rampage is going to be a revolution. It's going to be a new beginning for the Suicide Blondes. Because right now, there's one...two...three...but after Rampage...it'll be FOUR brother! And that is gonna mark the end of the Suicide Blondes. But at Rampage...a new beginning will start...the era...of Techno Team 2oo3!!! So whacha gonna do Chavo...Stevie...when Edge...Christian...The Hulkster...and Techno Team 2oo3 runs wild...on you?!?!?!"
*The music hits as their all too infamous logo lights of the F-T-R Tron*
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