Backstage at an FTR house show, Funaki is running about with a microphone.
Funaki: "I am world's greatest interviewer! I get big stories! I talk to..."
Funaki looks around, and spots Steve Austin over in the corner.
Funaki: "Stone! Cold! Steve! Austin!"
Funaki runs to Austin, who stares at him coldly.
Austin: "Can I help you? Assist you? Give you a hand?"
Funaki: "Indeed! You were challenged by Shane Douglas!"
Austin: "Shane Douglas? The Franchise? The Dean? The skateboarder? That Shane Douglas?"
Funaki: "Indeed!"
Austin: "Well hell, you tell Shane Douglas to skateboard his ass down to Rampage, put on his little tights and his little frilly boots, head on out to the ring..and I will stomp a mudhole in that son of a bitch's ass and walk it dry.
"When I came to the FTR, Funaki, I came here to take the so-called top stars and remind them of just what Austin 3:16 means. At Rampage, I took The Rock..opened up a can of whup ass....and knocked him around the ring like some kind of ping pong ball. And now who's gonna challenge me?
Kurt Angle?
Scott Steiner?
The Undertaker?
Eddie Guerrero?
Rob Van Dam?
Vader?
Bill Ding?
What?!"
Funaki: "Indeed!"
Austin: "It wasn't a damn one of them, you crazy son of a bitch! It was Shane Douglas. Douglas, you may have been the Franchise in ECW...but in the eyes of Stone Cold Steve Austin, you're nothing but a piece of CRAP. And do you know what you do with crap, son? You shovel it up, and dump it, and put dirt on top of it. And that's exactly what I'm going to do to you at Rampage. You think you're gonna beat me?
"EH-EH!
"That just ain't gonna happen, son. You can try all you want...but in the end......
"WHAM!
"Stunner! And that's just all there is to it! And that's the bottom line...."
Funaki: "Because Stone Cold Say So!"
Austin: "You know what Funaki?"
Funaki: "Indeed!"
Austin: "I like you."
Austin kicks Funaki in the stomach and...stops. He then turns around to see a member of the FTR backstage crew.
Austin: "Hey...you see this guy here? You see Funaki?"
FTR Crewman: "What?"
Austin: "Are you hard of hearing, son? I said do you see Funaki?"
FTR Crewman: "Yes...."
Austin: "I like him."
Austin kicks the crew member in the stomach, and gives him a Stunner! He then turns to Funaki, who is still doubled over and seems to be 100% ready to take a Stunner...and pats him on the back before walking away.
